“Any Day Above Dirt Is A Good Day”

8 04 2008

That’s the reply I heard from a client yesterday as he was asked by my receptionist, “how are you today?”  I stopped to think about that response for a minute and realized how an outlook such as this can really determine the direction of one’s day.

He was simply saying that just being alive (and therefore not “beneath dirt”) is enough to make it a good day.  The success of his day was not being determined by how much money he had, or didn’t have, what he ate or if he ate, what the weather was like, or any other material thing.  After all, this man was in a tax office picking up his return.  He was not at Disneyland or Bonanzaville.  He was some place people do not generally visit when seeking out excitement, fulfillment or overall “having a good day” feelings.  Circumstances are not what determines this person’s outlook.  Do circumstances determine yours?  I admit they do determine mine more often than I’d like.

I’d like to be able to respond to each day with the same outlook as this client, but some days I am just too caught up in my temporal wants and comforts, my shoulda, coulda, woulda’s to be content in my did’s can’s and will’s.

I battle clinical depression, and have done so most of my adult life.  So much of my battle is waged in faith and lack of faith; between contentment and desire.  I’m not unique by any standard in this respect, but sometimes my battles leave me feeling so tired, lost, and just plain lonely and hopeless.  I can tell myself that God will see me through (He ALWAYS does), but living like He will is way harder.  I had a pastor tell me one time to “fake it ’till I make it.”  He was saying that walk my walk as if it matched my talk.  In God’s time, they actually would match, or at least look very similar.  Right now, I’m faking it, and the walk and the talk are miles apart in many ways.  Is it possible to be “genuinely fake?”  I think so.  I hope so.  If not, I’m not sure what I am right now.

Beth

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One response

15 04 2008
your first nephew

Not sure I really side with the ‘fake it’ advice. I’m having my own difficulties in my walk and Life in general but I guarantee they’d be worse if I was trying to cover up. A walking witness really ought to show it all, even if it’s not perfect. Put yourself in their shoes… would you have any interest in a faith someone was pretending has no real struggles?

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